I am back from a much needed break. I have been blogging for over five years. Many of those years I was talking to no one. But I stayed at it. It was a year ago this past January I decided to start doing videos, that’s when things took off. Most of you following this blog, know about the censorship I have been hit by. It was sent to discourage me, and it did.
I was frustrated, angry and disheartened. The social media giants had greatly silenced my voice and I felt like I didn’t know what to do. I needed direction. If I am making videos and no one sees them, why am I making them, I thought? And if I can’t monetize my work, then I am working for free, and no one in their right mind works for free, I also thought. Here I am -a mom, a past SAG actress, doing comedic satire that leans Conservative and I am being crushed by the big guys. As I saw views, shares, follows, likes, and comments decline I felt like I had hit a total roadblock.
“When you are going through hell, just keep going,” words I LOVE by the great Winston Churchill. While I couldn’t agree with this more, I needed to press “pause.” Not stop, but pause. I needed to seek God on direction. I know that HE gave Conservative Momma to me, it’s not mine. Everything I have, belongs to God, and I needed a “time out” with the ONE that inspired all this in the first place.
What did I learn while I was away?
1. I learned I was waaaaaay too plugged in to the political scene. I think it is so healthy to be informed. I think it’s healthy to also be active in the political world, to use your voice to speak up and speak out. But I was at an unhealthy level. My phone was constantly alerting me on tweets, notifications, alerts and so forth. I was too plugged in. I was too engaged. I have since stopped the notifications on a lot of different things. My phone is more quiet now and it feels good. My home life is more quiet. I think achieving peace, also allows for clear thinking. I was reacting to so much that I saw, instead of taking a moment. When you take a moment clear thought has a chance to breath, there are enough people reacting to everything out there.
2. It’s a dark world. Yes, I knew this already, but I realize that the name calling doesn’t win anybody over. Calling someone a “Libtard” might make the person name-calling feel better for a moment, but that doesn’t win the argument. All this does is drive a deeper wedge between people. The more you love people, the harder it is for those people to hate you. You know how you win the argument- be the bigger person. The media wants Conservatives to be portrayed as a bunch of redneck racists. Our goal should be to show our own spheres of influence, that the media is DEAD wrong. You might then get those on the other side to listen. We have to stop yelling and start listening.
3. I will still call out hypocrisy. I know that the above sounds like I have become some sort of “softy,” but no, not a softy- just more Christ centered, that’s the way Christians are supposed to be. My hero, Jesus- did LOVE people relentlessly, but he also called out the hypocrites CONSTANTLY. I will continue to do the same.
4. Goals SET. I needed to set goals. I was kinda flailing with Conservative Momma. I knew I loved making videos, I knew I liked blogging, I knew I loved politics, but I didn’t have a clear direct focus. Now, I do. I know where I want to be five years from now, and this comes with specific “goal setting” and laying out how I plan on achieving the goals I have set.
5. Censorship is real, it does exist and it’s goal is to silence opposition. How do you defy censorship? By continuing to speak up. I was interviewed by a local paper last week and the journalist pointed out something really positive to me. Thirty years ago, the Nightly News and Mainstream Newspapers, were the only source of news to individuals. Whatever these sources said, was considered the truth, now with the Internet -this is no more the case. People are now looking elsewhere for the Truth. Yes Google can suppress sites, and Facebook can suppress videos, and Twitter can shadow ban, and this sucks……but that doesn’t mean the truth isn’t still out there to be found – you just have to work for it. You have to bookmark sites (like conservativemomma.com) you have to specifically go to pages to see the new information, you have to work a little harder- but it’s still there. Underneath all the cover up, truth eventually wins.
6. My hope is not in videos and it’s not in this blog, it’s in Jesus. At the end of the day, all that matters is that I am obedient to what God wants me to do. Obedience is all that matters. In order to really hear God, you have to be quiet. You have to slow down enough to let HIM speak. My identity isn’t in video views. My identity isn’t in how big my social media platform is. My identity is in Jesus. He loves me right where I am at. He has a specific plan for me, just like he has a specific plan for you. We are here for a purpose. You find that purpose when you let HIM lead.
I want to thank those of you who have partnered with me. Many of you have donated via Paypal, and have also become monthly patrons on my Patreon page and I am blessed by your support, even while I was on break trying to figure some stuff out. I am now back in the ring, focused, intentional and driven. Let’s do this.